The Court Begger.
ACT IV. SCENE I.
Enter Frederick, Gabriel.
Fre.THou art ſo honeſt, that I am aſham’d
The vice of Anger blinded ſo my Reaſon,
As not to ſee through thy tranſparent breaſt
A true and noble heart: ſuch as becomes
A Kinſman and a friend to her I love;
I can ſee now, and read thy integrity,
And, by the light of that th’inhumane falſe-hood
Of that Court-monſter, that compacted piece
Of Rapine, pride and Luſt.
That did aſpire to be a glorious Courtier.
Fre.Courtier? A meere vain glorious impoſture;
Pretending favour, having nothing leſſe.
Witneſſe his want of Merit. Merit only
It is that ſmoothes the brow of Majeſty,
And takes the comfort of thoſe precious beauties
Which ſhine from grace Divine: and hee’s a Traytor
(No way to ſtand a courtier) that to feed
His Luſts, and Riots, works out of his Subjects
The meanes, by forging grants of the Kings favour.
Gab.What my maſter has ſuffer’d by his forgeries
I know to be the Shipwrack even of all
Except his Daughter, and what his ayme at her
Was I thinke appeares to you; And what ſhe might
Have ſuffer’d by’t we both may gueſſe: onely we hope
Her vertue would have bin a guard to her beauty.
Fre.Tis plaine he never lov’d her vertuouſly
[Q6]That
The Court Begger.
That is fallen mad for another.
Gab.That madneſſe is his fate; which renders him into
my maſters hands to reſtore all agen. I, note the Juſtice
Fre.But as his fortune by the others ruine
Shall be advanc’d, I ſhall be more rejected.
Gab.That foule miſtruſt much miſbecomes a Love
Rejected ſir? by whom?
Chariſſa’s conſtant to you,
And time will cleare his frownes: and put you on
Now, the ſame confidence you had before;
His wanting fortune rais’d a ſtorme againſt you,
Your noble friend Sir
Raphael has already
By learned reaſons and court-oratory
Prevayl’d for you to viſit her: and now
Y’are come within the verge o’th’houſe, do you ſhrinke?
See, a good
Omen, they iſſue forth to meet you.
Enter Mendicant, ſir Raphael, Chariſſa.
Men.I’le heare no more on’t ſir, and am much ſorry
That ſo much Lip-labour is ſpent already
To wonder at your light inconſtancy,
Your want of reſolution: yea of judgement.
Gab.He is flown off agen.
Ra.Did you not give me leave to ſend for him;
Who, now is come to tender his affection
Men.Did not you firſt promiſe
(Ferd. Char.
To give aſſurance of fit joincture for her,
(and Gab.
Proportionable to her dowry, which
(aſide
You now are ſtarted from?
Nor can yet underſtand more of her dowry
Then a thouſand pound which her Unkle left her,
And anſwerably to that I will make good her joincture.
[Q6v]Men.
The Court Begger.
I meane to make her worth ten thouſand more
Out of my eſtate in the mad
Ferdinand.
Another ten thouſand to redeeme my Land,
Ten thouſand more i’le keep in bank for purchace.
Ra.A judgement’s fallen upon him: Hee’s mad too;
Struck lunatique with his o’er-weening hopes
Sprung from the others miſery.
Men.And ſo ſir, as you came you may depart:
For ’leſſe you bring a thouſand pound
per annum
T’aſſure upon her, ſhee’s no wife for you.
Fre.O ſir, you had better left me in that peace
I lately ſlept in, without any hope
Of ſeeing her againe, then by your ſummons
To ſtartle me back from a quiet death
To Kill me thus with Tantalizing tortures.
Men.Thank then your learned friend, who fail’d me in
His undertaking for you, and for her
If walls and locks can hold her, ſhee no more
Ra.Wherein have I fail’d ſir?
Men.Sir, in aſſuring joincture to her Dowry.
Ra.Sir to no poſſible dowry you can give her,
But you propound the eſtate you have i’ th’ Moon;
When ſhall you take poſſeſſion, thinke you, of your
Lordſhip of Lunacy in the
Cynthian Orbe?
Men.I ſhall climbe thither ſir without the helpe
Of your Heaven-ſcaling ladder of Philoſophy.
Ra.Nay then ſir heare me.
Fre.Remember, ſweet, your vow.
Cha.Moſt conſtantly. And let me conjure you by
Cha.That you forget not yours.
[Q7]Gab.
The Court Begger.
Gab.Quick, quick! i’le ſtand before you.
Cha.And time at length will point us out a meanes
After a ſhort long-ſeeming ſeparation
To meet and reunite our vowes and faiths
With greater ſtrength and ſervour.
Was it for that you whiſper’d, politick ſir?
And couldſt thou ſtand their ſcreene? thou treacherous
Men.Darſt thou expoſtulate?
Thou death deſerving Villaine.
Hurts him.
And Huſwife get you in: you may depart ſirs
Has your love blinded you? i’le lead you then.
Cha.O ſir you are unkinde,
Love then a wilfull father is leſſe blind.
Exit.
Ra.Friend, has he hurt thee?
Gab.I am ſure I bleed for’t.
Ra.Why how now
Frederick? deſpaire not man.
He has vex’d me; and out of my vexation
Shall ſpring thy comfort. I will labour for thee,
I’le ſtudy nothing more then to beguile
This watchfull fury; this
Hisperian Dragon.
Say to thy ſelfe and boldly ſhee’s thine owne,
And for thy meanes
(Baſta) let me alone.
Fre.You are my noble Patron.
As I was his ſervingman, I am rewarded;
Tis common with us creatures to ſerv’d ſo:
But, as I am no more his ſervant, I
Am free to vindicate my ſelfe out of
The wrong done to my blood (which is the ſame
With his,) by him rejected and deſpis’d.
[Q7v]Enter.
The Court Begger.
Enter Cit-wit.
Cit.Sir
Andrew Mendicant at home?
Gab.Not to be ſpoken with at this time ſir.
Cit.Pray let him know that the Lady
Strangelove
Requires him ſodainly to remove his Madman
Out of her houſe; or ſhee muſt take a courſe
Much to his diſadvantage.
Cit.This is a ſurly fellow, and tho’ I have ſworn
The humor of fighting is ſcarce warme in me yet,
And ſhe adviſes him to find a better Doctor for him,
For this has taken a wrong courſe.
Cit.I’le tell you as a ſecret. The Phyſitian thought
to have cur’d his patient, (who has bin a notable Game-
ſter at
In and
In) between my Ladies legs. If I and two
or three more (but chiefly my ſelfe indeed) had not
reſcued her, the Doctor had held the Lady-cow to the
Cit.He thinks I lie now. And ſhould he gi’ me the lie,
the vertue of my Oath were queſtionable.
Gab.Is this upon your knowledge ſir?
Cit.True upon my life. So farewell honeſt friend.
Exit.
Gab.This may prove ſport and buſineſſe too.
Ra.We will do ſomething ſodainly.
Gab.What if you take me into that ſomething too?
I gueſſe it is ſome ſtratagem to beguile
The cautious father of his injur’d daughter.
Ra.This fellow will betray us.
All that I have, my fortune in
Chariſſa
On his fidelity, ſir his thoughts are mine.
Ra.Cupid and
Mercury favour our deſigne.
Ex. Om.
[Q8]SCENE
The Court Begger.
ACT IV. SCENE II.
Enter Court-wit, and Doctor.
Cou.Your judgement (by your favour) Mr. Doctor
Much faild you in that caſe.
Doc.Your reaſon yet may plead
Mine innocence, that drew her but to viſit him.
Cou.But that drew on his fury; and though reaſon
May argue much for you, ſhee can heare none,
Nor any underſtand: The ſwift affrightment
Upon her ſtrength of paſſion, ſtruck ſo deepe
A ſenſe into her, that is has depriv’d her
Of all her proper ſenſes. She is even mad ſir.
Doc.Not paſt my cure; and by a preſent meanes
Pray, win her hither to ſee a madder object
Then is her ſelfe, and ſee how that will worke.
Cou.I’le gladly ad my paines unto your ſkill.
Exit.
Doc.Come forth into the aire. Conduct him gently.
Enter Frederick with the ſervants.
Fre.Into the aire! Set me upon Mount
Lathmos.
Where I may ſee, and contemplate the beauty
Of my ador’d
Diana; or carry me
Up to
Hymettus top,
Cytheron, Othris or
Pindus
Where ſhee affects to walke and take the ayre;
Or tarry, ſtay, perhaps ſhee hunts to day
I’ th’ woods of
Merathon, or
Erymanthus.
Doc.That’s a long journey ſir.
Fre.Y’are a long bearded foole.
Doc.I thought I had been a Phiſitian. But ſir
You ſhall not need t’expoſe your ſelfe to travell,
Your Goddeſſe will deſcend into this Garden,
Paſſe but time here a while and ſhee’l come to you.
Fre.We will have joviall paſtime. Shall we run
At baſe, or leape-frog, or dance naked
To entertaine her, or what do you thinke
Of downe-right drinke and ſinging?
[Q8v]Doc.
The Court Begger.
Fer.Let’s have a mad catch then.
Enter Court-Swaine. Strangelove.
Cou.Here Madam may you ſee the Madmans Revels
Sw.And after that the Doctors Tragicomedy.
Fer.Are not your wind pipes tun’d yet? Sing
A Catch
So now a Dance, I am all ayre—Ahaigh— Ahaigh
I thanke thee
Mercury that haſt lent thy wings
Unto my feete. Play me my Countrey Dance,
Stand all you by. Theſe Laſſes and theſe Swaines
He Dances a conceited Countrey Dance, firſt doing
his honours, then as leading forth his Laſſe. He danceth
both man and womans actions, as if the Dance conſiſted
of two or three couples, at laſt as offering to Kiſſe his
Laſſe, hee fancies that they are all vaniſh’d, and eſpies
Strangelove.
How now! all vaniſh’d, ha!
It is no mervaile that the leſſer lights
Become obſcur’d when
Cynthia appeares,
Let me with Adoration fall before
Thy Deity great Goddeſſe.
Sw.You muſt approach no nearer ſir. The Goddeſſe
Is not ſo confident in her Divinity
As to truſt you in reach of her.
Fer.What
Hydras, Gorgons, and
Chymæras are you;
Centaures and
Harpies that dare interpoſe
Between my hopes, and my felicity!
Cou.Doctor, away with him.
Doc.Carry him to his Chamber,
And hold him down. His raging fit is on him.
Fer.Was Night made to ſurpriſe men at Noonday?
R[1]Or
The Court Begger.
Or ſhall the charmes of
Heccate take force
To dimne
Appollo’s brightneſſe? So’t muſt be,
When Gods themſelves give way to Deſtine.
Exiunt
with Ferd.
Sw.They are enough to hold, and binde him too.
(Swa.
Come you afore the Lady.
(pulls back
Doct.What’s her pleaſure?
(the Doctor.
Sw.Tis to do Juſtice upon thee O Doctor.
Stirre, or cry out, or give the leaſt reſiſtance,
And I will cut thy head off before judgement.
Doct.What outrage doe you intend?
Cou.Outrage! Can you thinke of an outrage above
the horror you offerd to this Lady. To violate her cha-
Sw.Tis ſaid, and you are guilty. Proceed to judge-
Str.I firſt would heare your cenſures.
Enter Cit-wit.
Cit.And mine among the reſt good Madam. I have
taken care that a new Doctor ſhall be brought. Therefore
in the firſt place my cenſure is, that this be preſently hang’d
Cou.That’s too high ſtraind. What thinke you Ma-
dam, if to rectify his judgement, wee pick’d all the
errours of his braine; Firſt, opening the
Pericranion, then
take out the
cerebrum; waſh it in
Albo vino, till it be
throughy clens’d; and then—
Sw.Pox o’ your
Albo vino, and his
cerebrum taking out,
that were a way to kill him. Wee muſt not be guily of
the death of a Dogleach, but have him purg’d a ſafer
Sw.We will fill his belly full of Whey, or Butter-
milke, put him naked into a Hogs-head, then put into
[R1v]the
The Court Begger.
the ſame an hundred broken Urinalls, then cloſe up the
Veſſell and roll your Garden with it.
Doct.I truſt they cannot meane any ſuch miſchiefe.
Str.Hearke yee Gentlemen. Do you heare?
(A Guel-
Cit.Yes Madam, tis a Sowgelder.
(ders horne.
Str.Fetch in that Miniſter of Juſtice.
Cit.Who Madam? the Sowgelder?
Sw.Wee’l make a Doctor guelder of him tho’, and
Cit.That will be ſport indeed.
Exit.
Cou.But will you ſee the execution Madam?
Str.Why not as well as other women have
Seene the diſſections of Anotamies,
And executed men rip’d up and quarter’d?
This ſpectacle will be comicall to thoſe.
Doct.They dare not doe the thing they would have
Sw.Now Doctor you look heavily methinks,
You ſhall be lighter by two ſtone preſently.
Doct.You will not murder me?
Sw.Stirre not; nor make leaſt noyſe
As you hope ever to be heard agen.
Doct.I would I could pray now to any purpoſe.
Enter Cit-wit, Guelder.
Cit.I have brought him. The rareſt fellow Madam,
And doe you thanke your fortune in him Doctor,
For he can ſing a charme (he ſayes) ſhall make
You feele no paine in your libbing or after it:
No Tooth-drawer, or Corne-cutter did ever worke
With ſo little feeling to a Patient.
Str.Sing then, he ſhall not ſuffer without a Song.
Song.
Sw.What muſt he be ſtript now; or will letting down
R 2Doct.
The Court Begger.
Doct.You dare not uſe this violence upon me
More rude then rage of Prentices.
Cit.Doctor it is decreed.
Doct.You cannot anſwer it.
Cou.Better by Law then you can the intent
(Guelder
Of rape upon the Lady.
(whets his
Doct.That was not to have beene my act,
(knife and
Sw.When this is done wee’l talke w’ye,
(preparati-
come lay him croſſe this table. Hold each of
(on, Linnen,
you a Leg of him, and hold you your peace
(Baſon, &c.
Dodipoll. And for his armes let me alone, do you work
Doct.Hold, I have a ſecret to deliver to my Lady.
Sw.You ſhall be deliver’d of your ſecrets preſently.
Doct.If I tell her not that ſhall give her pardon
Then let me ſuffer. Heare me ſweet Madam.
Str.Forbeare him, let him down.
Sw.Sweet ſayſt? Thou art not i’le be ſworne.
Str.Well ſir your weighty ſecret now to ſave your
Doc.In private I beſeech you Madam: for I dare but
Str.You ſhall allow me ſo much warineſſe as to have
one at leaſt to be my Guard, and witneſſe.
Doc.This Gentleman then Madam.
Cit.We are ſhut out of councell.
Sw.No matter. I liſt not be no nearer him: no more
wou’d my cozen had he my noſe. But where’s Mr.
Dainty
and your finicall Miſtris
Phil all this while tho’?
Cit.No matter, but I ha’ ſworn you know. Therefore
I ſay no more, but I have ſworn.
Cou.What a ſtrange tale is this! I can’t believe it.
Str.I doe, and did before ſuſpect it: and fram’d this
counterfet plot upon you, Doctor, to worke out the
[R2v]diſcovery
The Court Begger.
diſcovery: would I ha’ ſeene you guelt dee think? That
would have renderd mee more brutiſh then the women
Barbers. Looke ſir this is no Guelder, but one of my
houſe Muſick. (Goe, your part is done—
Exit.
And for th’ affright you gave me, Doctor, I am evenw’ye.
Sw.The Devill fright him next for a ſpurging, ſkitter-
brooke. ’Twere good you would call to burne ſome
Str.But for the ſecret you have told me i’le keepe it
ſecret yet, I will keepe you ſo too; and from your
[Link]
There’s a new Doctor come already Madam to the
Str.From ſir
Andrew Mendicant?
Boy.His ſervant brought him.
Doc.I pray what Doctor is it?
Str.Ingage your ſelſe with no deſire to know,
But, for the good you finde, fit thanks to owe;
So come with me, and come you Gentlemen.
Ex. Omnes.
ACT IV. SCENE III.
Enter Frederick in a Doctors habit, Gabriel with two
ſwords under his cloake, Ferdinand upon a Bed
bound, and held down by ſervants.
Fer.HEape yet more Mountaines, Mountaines upon
Mountaines,
Pindus on
Oſſa, Atlas on
Olympus,
I’le carry that which carries Heaven, do you
Fre.Forbeare you’l ſtifle him,
Take off the needleſſe weight of your rude bodies;
Unbind him and ſtand off, to give him ayre.
Ser.Sir though you are a Phiſitian, I am no foole.
R 3Take
The Court Begger.
Take heede what you doe. Hee’s more then ſix of us
hold when his hot fit’s upon him. He would now teare
you to pieces ſhould you let him looſe.
Fer.The danger then be mine. Let him ſit up. Is not
Ser.I, for how long? do you note that
Hercules eye
Fre.I charge you quit the roome.
Ser.Tis but to come agen when we are call’d.
Fre.Be not within the hearing of a call,
Or if you chance to heare me, though I cry
Murder, I charge you come not at me.
Ser.Tis but a Doctor out o’ the way; and that’s no
loſſe while there are ſo many, the beſt cannot live by
Fre.Keep the doore faſt. You are much miſt abroad ſir,
And chiefly by the Ladies, who now want
The Court-ſhips, Banquets, and the coſtly preſents
In which you wonted to abound to ’em.
Fre.Nay, nay, ſit ſtill ſir. They ſay y’are mad;
Mad with conceit of being a favorite
Before your time, that is, before you had merit
More then a tumour of vaine-glory in you,
And in eſpeciall care for your recovery
I am ſent to adminiſter unto you: but firſt
Ferd.Ho! Murder, Murder, Murder.
Fre.Are you ſo ſenſible already? do not ſtirre
Nor cry too loud. Dos the meere apprehenſion
Of blood-letting affright your madneſſe? Then
Ferd.The Battaile of
Muſleborough Field was a
Fre.O do you fly out agen?
[R3v]Ferd.
The Court Begger.
Ferd. Sings part of the old Song, and acts it madly.
Fre.This is pretty: but back from the purpoſe.
He ſings agen.
Fre.Will you come to the point ſir?
Ferdinand ſings agen.
Fre.We but loſe time in this ſir: Though it be good
teſtimony of your memory in an old Song. But do you
Ferd.Not know my Soveraigne Lord? Curs’d be thoſe
Knees, and hearts that fall not proſtrate at his Feete.
Fre.This wild ſubmiſſion no way mittigates
My wrongs, or alters reſolution in me
To Cure or Kill you quickly. Do you know me now ſir?
(Off his
Or have you known
Chariſſa?
do you ſtart ſir?
(beard &
There’s ſigne of reaſon in you then: But bee’t
(gown.
By reaſon or by chance, that you awake
Out of your frantick ſlumber, to perceive me,
My cauſe and my Revenge is ſtill the ſame,
Which I will proſecute according to
My certaine wrong, and not your doubtfull reaſon,
Since reaſonleſſe you layd thoſe wrongs upon me
When you were counted wiſe, great, valiant, and what not
That cryes a Courtier up, and gives him power
To trample on his betters.
Ferd.Who talkes this mortall to? I am a ſpirit.
Fre.Sure I ſhall finde you fleſh, and penetrable.
Ferd.I would but live to ſubdue the
Piſidians,
And ſo to bring the
Lydians under tribute—
Fre.You would but live t’abuſe more credulous fathers
With courtly promiſes, and golden hopes
For your own luſtfull ends upon their Daughters.
Thinke (if you can thinke now) upon
Chariſſa.
Chariſſa who was mine, in faith and honour
Till you ignobly (which is damnably)
By a falſe promiſe with intent to whore her
R 4Diverted
The Court Begger.
Diverted her weake Father from the Match
To my eternall loſſe. Now whether you
Have wit or no wit to deny’t, or ſtand to’t,
Or whether you have one, or ten mens ſtrength,
Or all, or none at all i’le fight or Kill you
Yet like a Gentleman, i’le call upon you
(Throw away
Give me the Swords. They are of equall length
(his dags.
Fre.I caſt that to you then. Hand it, or die a
Gab.All this ſir to a Madman.
Fre.I have a cauſe to be more mad then he,
And in that cauſe i’le fight.
Gab.He knowes not what you tell him.
Fre.I tell’t the Devill in him then to divulge it
When I have diſpoſſeſt him. I have further
Reaſon to kill him yet, to croſſe your Maſter,
Who has beg’d his Eſtate. Now fight or die a Mad-
Ferd.Hold
Frederick hold. Thou haſt indeed awak’d
Me to ſee thee and my ſelfe.
Gab.Hee’s not ſo mad to fight yet I ſee that.
Fre.I’m glad you are your ſelfe ſir, I ſhall fight
Now upon honorable tearmes, and could
Suppoſe before your madnes counterfeit.
Ferd.Yet hold. Has
Mendicant beg’d me?
Fre.During your madneſſe. What ſhould hinder
Fre.Upon no tearmes, and you alive.
Ferd.Not to obtaine
Chariſſa?
Ferd.It ſhall be by meanes if gold can win
[R4v]Her
The Court Begger.
Fre.That’s moſt unqueſtionable.
Ferd.Not that I dare not fight, doe I urge this,
But that the other is your ſafer way.
Fre.Your gold’s too light. I will accept of nothing
From you while you dare tell me you dare fight,
Perhaps you doubt of ods, goe forth. Nay I
Gab.You may: For I dare truſt you while I go
Fre.Now are you pleas’d, or dare you now to
Ferd.I neither will nor dare fight in this cauſe.
Fre.This is a daring Courtier!
How durſt you wind your ſelfe in ſo much danger?
And why take madneſſe in you, to be bound,
And grapled with ſo rudely?
Fre.Tis a faire condition.
Ferd.Firſt, for the wrong I did thee, noble youth
In my deſigne againſt
Chariſſa’s honour,
It is confeſs’d, repented; and her ſelfe
For ſatisfaction to be given to thee,
I’le fall upon thy Sword elſe, or be poſted,
And Ballated with all diſgrace.
Ferd.And for my ſhew of madneſſe; ’twas put on
For my revenge on this impetuous Lady
To coole theſe flames (as much of anger as
Deſire) with her diſdaine, and tempting malice
Fre.You would have raviſh’d her.
Ferd.I rather thought, ſhe like a cunning Lady
Would have conſented to a Madman, who
She might preſume could not impeach her honor
[R5]By
The Court Begger.
By leaſt detection. Monkeyes, Fooles, and Madmen,
That cannot blab, or muſt not be believ’d
Fre.And on that preſumption
You fain’d your madneſſe.
Fre.But rather then to faile,
(her:
With your bawd Doctors helpe you would ha’ forc’d
And that’s the councell you would have me keep
On your aſſurance of
Chariſſa to me:
That your proceeding in your madneſſe here,
May yet finde meanes and opportunity
To exerciſe your violence.
Fre.Thou art not worth my Killing now.
Juſtice will marke thee for the Hangmans Office:
Nor, were
Chariſſa in thy gift, were ſhee,
In that, worth mine or any good acceptance,
And for your councell, had within there Madam.
Fre.The Lady of the houſe! where are you?
Will you be pleas’d to heare a ſecret Madam?
Enter Strangelove, Gabriel, Doctor.
Str.I doe not ſlight your act in the diſcovery,
But your impoſture ſir, and beaſtly practiſe
Was before whiſper’d to me by your Doctor
Fred.I am diſgrac’d, undone.
To make you the perpetuall ſhame of Court;
And will aſſuredly doe’t, if you comply not
With me to make this injur’d Gentlemans fortune
[R5v]Ferd.
The Court Begger.
Ferd.Madam moſt readily, I have offer’d it.
Sw.I have forecaſt the way and meanes already:
Which we muſt proſecute with art and ſpeed.
Good ends oft times doe bad intents ſucceede.
Ferd.I’le be directed by you.
Fre.Nobleſt Lady.
Exeunt Omnes.