ACT TWO*
2.1
Enter PANTALONI, GUADAGNI [and] NICOLO, with a
ZAFFI’S* habit under his arm.

143PantaloniIs this Chequino’s house, your advocate?

144GuadagniIt is, and Prospero, your learned counsel,
        Is with him here, attending too our coming.

145Pantaloni’Tis well. Give me my writings, Nicolo.
        Please you to enter: I’ll despatch my manGUAD[AGNI] exits
        And follow instantly. Now Nicolo,
        About the serious business, Nicolo,
        In which this morning I instructed you.

146NicoloFor your revenge, sir.

147PantaloniRight. My apprehension
        On that discourteous, cursèd courtesan:
        ’Twill breed me more delight than all the dalliances
        I could have found in her most free embraces.
        I hug my quick and sweet invention for it.
        Here, take this gold, this bright refulgent gold,
        Twenty chequins, and promise twenty more
        On the performance of the brave exploit.*
        ’Twill take unto my wish, I do foresee’t.

148Nicolo’Twill be, sir, such a notable revenge
        That the report of it in after-ages
        Will either mortify concupiscence
        In young lascivious harlots*, or at least
        Fright out of ’em their itch of wronging age:
        They shall no more dare to put youthful tricks
        On years and gravity*.

149PantaloniRight, my Nicolo.

150Nicolo’Slid, sir, and if you should not be revenged,
        An old man should not step in the bordello
        Without the taunts of boys and gondoliers,
        Crying “Take *heed, old man, you be not served
        As the Novella* fitted Pantaloni”.*
        So in short time, the City were well served,
        When age shall be ashamed to crawl to lechery*.

151PantaloniRight, witty knave. Go heartily about it.
        Think what a master ’tis thou dost it for,
        That has no slender tie upon thy duty:
        One that has bred thee from a youngling up
        To this maturity.

152NicoloI must acknowledge it.

153PantaloniAnd, Nicolo, it was no petty kindness
        To manumise your father from the galley*,
        Which you cannot forget.

154Nicolo   [Aside]*   Yet must I hear it――――?

155PantaloniBut I’ll urge thee no further. Boy, be careful:
        Work but this for me with effect and speed*,
        And bind me as a father to thy need*.[PANTALONI] exits

156NicoloYou have even spoiled all now. I had as good a mind
        And thought to ha’ gone as heartily about
        This piece of villainy as the devil that*
        Is in my master could* devise or wish,
        Till that o’er-doing spirit put me out.
        Could he not see ’twas well and mischievous
        Enough in conscience, but himself must cross it?
        Does he think by redeeming of my father
        To slave me with his boasts, and foul upbraidings?
        Had he still rowed i’th’ galley, I not knowing,
        The toil, the smart and grief had been his own:
        Now I inherit what was then his pain,
        Hearing continually the clash of’s care*,
        And his fell stripes, out of this babbler’s mouth,
        Which more than kills my thanks; it wreaks my spleen.
        To brag of benefits one hath bestown
        Doth make the best seem less, and most seem none:
        So often times the greatest courtesy
        Is by the doer made an injury.
Enter FABRITIO

157FabritioNicolo, well met. I saw you house* my father,
        And waited for you. Come you shall draw near.
        This is a near friend’s lodging.*
(PISO, FRANCISCO, HORATIO at a table. Wine, etc.*)*

         Gentlemen,
        My father’s special man I told you of.
        Pray bid him welcome.

158HoratioMost entirely.
        Please you to sit, sir. Here’s a short potation.

159PisoBut good liatico, I assure you, sir.
        I’ll be your taster to quit fear of danger*,PISO drinks
        And now I’ll let you know we have made oath
        Upon this nimble master of invention*,
        This sprightly* liquor, to be firm and faithful
        To one another in a present project.
        Take you the same and grow in one with us*.

160NicoloMay I not ask what end your project aims at?

161FranciscoNor what, nor unto whose――――

162PisoLet it suffice,
        We carry that about us shall end you*,They draw stilettoes
        And presently, if you comply not with us.

163NicoloNay, nay, by fair means, gentlemen, I pray.
        I am apt enough to mischief of myself.
        Look ye. I swear with you.He drinks.

164Horatio’Tis well. Now know
        ’Tis for the good of your young master here.

165NicoloThen you would use me in some treachery
        Against my old one.

166PisoThou art a soothsayer.

167NicoloLook you, I’ll swear again. I like your oath,
        Your deep lyatic oath* here, wond’rous well.He drinks thrice

168Fabritio’Tis well done, Nicolo: try the bottom of’t*――

169NicoloI will comply now and complot with you
        And was indifferently prepared before.
        Provided always that it tend not to
        Danger of’s life.

170FabritioCould’st think me such a villain?

171NicoloNay, if it were, ’twere no disparagement
        To stake my head with yours*. But gentlemen,
        Please ye fall roundly now upon the business,
        I have now sworn enough.

172PisoThen you must answer
        To these intergatories*. First do you know
        If the old men, Guadagni and Pantaloni,
        Do hold their purpose for their match tomorrow*
        Betwixt Fabritio here and Flavia?

173NicoloThey are marrying of ’em now at their lawyers’*,
        By deed and covenant, under hand and seal*.
        I left them and their books there now together,
        And for the priest tomorrow is the day.

174HoratioIs not Fabritio missed at home this morning?

175NicoloNo, not at all: the old man’s mind’s so carried
        Upon the wings of this new marriage fortune―――
        I cry you mercy, sir. You are the gentleman,
        I think, that should have had her.

176FranciscoIn good time, sir.

177NicoloIn good time, may you. I’ll do something for you.

178FabritioHonest, deserving Nic.

179NicoloSir, thus it is:
        My master sent in my young master’s name
        (The more to endear* his service and his care
        To the young lady) that the merchantess,
        The rich she-pedlar of the Merceria,
        Should visit her today with all her wares,
        For her to take her choice to deck her brideship.
        If you know how to plough now with that heifer**,
        You may perhaps convey a message to her.

180HoratioI know her and will fit you with directions.

181FranciscoThou hast given a hint, for which I will renown thee.

182PisoBut Nicolo, where was your reverend master
        Attended by yourself before daylight?

183FabritioPrithee inquire not further: ’twas not he.

184NicoloThe doubtful light deceived you, sir.

185PisoNo more than noon i’faith, a man may spy
        An old whore-master in the darkest night
        Like an old cat, by th’ gloring of his eyes.
        Will his old mutton-mongership ne’er leave?
        He is already known sufficiently
        Through the city for his gift that way;
        And yet he will deny his son free choice
        And force him marry one he not affects.

186HoratioThat is his drift, whereby he may inherit
        From him the same licentiousness; and make
        The world acknowledge him the more his son.

187PisoBut has he made the purchase? Has he bought
        The famous piece of flesh, the rare Novella?

188NicoloI could unshale a plot.

189HoratioNe’er doubt but do’t then.

190PisoMy noble Nicolo out with’t, I say.

191NicoloI would entreat the favour of this senate*
        I might unfold it only unto one.

192FranciscoTake your free choice.

193NicoloTo you, young master, then.
           [Aside to FRANCISCO]*   Take heed we render not ridiculous
        Your father to the wildness of their youth:
        But to yourself I will disclose a secret
        That may be wrought to your advantage.


195Nicolo’Tis true, my master was with the Novella,
        Drawn by the loose desires of wanton flesh;
        But such a foul affront he did receive
        As justly doth provoke his dire revenge,
        Which he hath trusted me to execute.

196FabritioHow, Nicolo? But first, what was th’ affront?

197NicoloHe bargained with her; and for some large price
        She yielded to be his. But in the night
        In the conditioned bed was laid a moor;
        A hideous and detested blackamoor,
        Which he (demanding light to please his eye*,
        As old men use all motives*)
        Discovered; and, enraged, forsook the house,
        Affrighted and ashamed to ask his coin again*.

198FabritioBut seeks revenge! How, how, good Nicolo?

199NicoloThus sir: you know what common disrepute*
        Falls upon man or woman that is found
        Conversing with the common city-hangman,
        That nearest kindred after such converse
        Shun their society, as they would do him
        (The hangman’s self) so odious are they held,
        Except it be those officers allowed
        By the state-public to negotiate with him.

200FabritioI know it, Nicolo. But what can follow?

201Nicolo’Tis plotted that the hangman shall go to her,
        And be discovered with her in such sort,
        As her disgrace shall force her fly the city;
        And I have undertaken to effect it.

202FabritioIt must be then by bribing of the hangman:
        And how can’st thou do that with thine own safety?
        Thou may’st be so discovered and so hated.

203NicoloFor that, observe the politic* invention
        Of my old master: the habit of a Zaffi*,
        One of th’inferior ministers of justice,
        That walks between the Senate and their friend,
        The executioner of their commands.

204FabritioBut what disguise shall shroud* the hangman thither*,
        Whose own shape is as horrid as the plague?

205NicoloThe habit of some stranger in the city,
        Which* here is gold to purchase.

206FabritioThou hast informed,
        Nay more, thou hast inspired me, Nicolo!
        I shall find way by this to break the contract
        My father would enforce; preserve his credit;
        And save the poor Novella from the fame**
        My father threatens by his own disgrace.
        Be then but true to me.

207NicoloSir, if I fail―――

208FabritioEnough: I’ll trust thee. Keep the gold thyself;
        Give me this habit. Get thyself another
        In all points like it, and in that return
        Unto my father; confidently tell him
        The hangman undertakes it, and at five,
        Soon in the evening in stranger’s habit,
        He will accost her.

209NicoloSir ―――

210FabritioI’ll see’t performed.
        Trust to my word and care, and thy reward.

211NicoloI leave all to you, sir. And crave my dismission.

212PisoWhat! Has he done?

213FabritioMost friendly. Farewell, Nicolo.NICOLO exits
        He has given me plot enough, if I but work it;
        And it produce not comic sport i’th’end
        I must subscribe my wit is not my friend.*
        I must crave your assistance, gentlemen.

214HoratioWe have been plotting too*.

215FranciscoAnd though our project run not the same way,
        It may conclude with yours to crown the day.

216PisoSo: to your several ways.

217HoratioI am for the Novella*.All exit
2.2
VICTORIA above*, looking in a glass; JACCONETTA; and BORGIO*.

218VictoriaSo, I am ready: and trust me Jacconetta,
        My pretty moor (for so I still must call thee
        For thy dear master’s sake that gave thee to me*)
        Thou art grown skilful in these quaint attires,
        So lately unacquainted with my wearing*:
        Thou hast played the good beginner at this dressing,
        And by thine industry and further practice,
        I doubt not but my knowledge will grow ripe.

219Borgio   Aside*   And by that knowledge, you yourself soon rotten*.
        O! Could these creatures grow still towards ripeness;
        Or, being ripe, abide so, and no further*,
        What excellent fruit they were!

220VictoriaWhat say you, Borgio*?

221BorgioI say among the twenty thousand courtesans*
        In and about this city, none becomes
        The dressing or the habit* like yourself,
        Your most unparalleled self*! But, noblest lady,
        Think ’tis your person beautifies the dress,
        Not it, your person.

222VictoriaWhy not it my person?*

223BorgioYes, as the flame the fuel:
        To work it into coals and so to ashes.

224VictoriaStill, Borgio, in your old morality!

225BorgioThese tires, these chains, these paintings, and these gauds*
        Are but the sprigs and leaves* the butchers use
        To set out flesh to sale with; or, at best,
        But the gay garlands which adorn the beast
        Prepared for sacrifice* ――――

226VictoriaPeace, Borgio, peace.

227BorgioAnd as those beasts, so senseless are you women
        Of the most certain danger you put on
        With your vainglorious gaiety: chips and straws,
        To kindle fire of lust, in whose lewd* flame
        Sinks (with Troy’s buildings)* Nature’s choicest fame*.

228VictoriaI would I understood this misery!
        Deal freely with me, Borgio: what new art
        Hast thou in practice, that thou set’st a face
        Shiningly varnished with divinity
        On a profession that makes Nature vile
        In her own shame? Lust’s instrument!*
        Nay, case of instruments: holding all means
        For propagation and maintaining of it*,
        To make thy gain out of its dregs and fragments*.
        Tell me, dost think by preaching modesty
        To quit thee of the baseness of thy trade:
        A poor, necessitous bravo? Or hast hope
        To live upon my honesty and yet be still
        Thyself a ruffiano?

229BorgioI would give o’er,
        Would you; and change my function.*

230VictoriaHa, ha, ha,――――

231JacconettaWhat mean you, Borgio? Would you now spoil all?
        Did you instruct her in this way of profit,
        And no less pleasant too than profitable
        (As most of my books’ titles are)* whereby
        She was so well resolvèd to go on―――

232BorgioHold thy peace, fool: she will run on the faster.
        Thou know’st not how much harm preaching has done
        ’Mongst women. She will prove the only sweepstake*
        In all the city.

233JacconettaOh! Are you there*, devil?

234VictoriaSir, leave this grumbling or I’ll turn you off*
        Amongst your brothers and your sons, (ruffianos*),
        To lurch i’th’ night betwixt eleven and two
        To rob and drown for prey*; till, being taken,
        Immediate hanging follows.

235BorgioI’m now your creature,
        My noble, resolute mistress; now I adore you;
        Now you shine bright; your bravery now becomes you.
        Yet (let me tell you under fair correction)
        I have some cause to hinder your desires,
        And theirs that seek you more, yet, for a time.

236VictoriaYour reason, sir?

237BorgioYou know I was preferred to you for a bravo*
        Of long and dear experience. I have served
        Six, the most famous dames* this city bred
        These sixty years; none scorning my advice
        By which*, and their endeavours, they grew up
        To purse the price of providences, which bestowed
        The most in public; some in pious uses
        Purchased them fame, almost canonization.
        The last and least of them, Margarita Emiliana*
        Founded the Augustinian Monastery*
        I showed you late, where she has daily prayers*.
        These women, whom successively I served,
        Fell not by rash adventure* unto all
        Great Fortune’s offers*; but by sound advice
        (Which kept their bodies sound and riched their coffers)
        Were long ere they embraced, by which their price
        And beauty grew of greater estimation.
        My profit in this too is unneglected:
        For long suspense and tedious expectation*
        Bring me more certain fees; where if you fell
        Immediately to work, my work were done
        And your own too, perhaps too soon. Witness the falls
        That pox and poverty have brought on many,
        When their youth’s flame was spent and they rejected*,
        When others of their sisterhood* were embraced
        Into a wholesome nunnery.

238VictoriaThis fellow speaks my thoughts. Borgio, I thought
        You had respect to your particular profit
        In all this winding wariness for my good.

239BorgioYou may conceive, ’twould grieve me, that (where now
        You have continual, new and bounteous suitors
        That yield me fees for the bare sight of you)
        You should in yielding to their common use*
        Send one man cloyed away, t’affright another
        From his approach.

240VictoriaBorgio, no more of this.
        A dear friend put you to me, for whose sake
        I hitherto have followed your advice,
        In hoisting up the price of my virginity.

241JacconettaTo such a rate no common purse dares venture,
        Nor common folks presume t’approach the house.

242VictoriaAnd such as did attempt, by offering less,
        I have sent back with shame: as the old youth*
        Last night, for which I thank thee, Jacconetta.

243JacconettaI think I cooled his grave concupiscence.

244VictoriaAnd therefore, doubt not, careful Borgio:
        Unless I meet a husband by the way
        I will not stoop* this month at a less rate
        Than the proposed sum and your consent.

245BorgioI thank you more than if you had possessed
        Me of the value of that sum proposed.

246Jacconetta   [Aside]*   He means her maidenhead!   [To BORGIO]   I’faith, good sir,
        The mark’s grown out of your old chaps*, or else
        Hang me if I believed you, by that little
        I know of man.

247VictoriaSo now about our business.
        Some of my visitants I know are near.
        Wait circumspectly, Borgio.

248BorgioYou need not doubt me.[BORGIO] exit[s]*

249Victoria   [Aside]   There is some hidden virtue in this fellow
        Or dangerous ill; but whether, let it be*;
        As was my birth, my purpose shall be free.*
            [Aloud]   Make fit my chamber, Jaconet. But first
        Give me my lute; and set me for the sign*
        Of what I mean to be, the famed Novella.
[JACCONETTA presents a lute and exits]
Song.
Whilst she plays and sings above, BORGIO waits below.*Many gallants pass over the stage, gazing at her. PISO is received in by BORGIO; after him a French cavalier*; then a brave Spaniard*; and after him a glorious German*. BORGIO takes fees of all as they enter the house.
The Song ended, BORGIO appears above with VICTORIA.

250VictoriaNow, Borgio, how speaks your muster roll?
        What? Are you full?

251BorgioI have an army royal
        Of princely spirits*, ready for encounter*.

252VictoriaBut one at once*, good Borgio.

253BorgioI have encamped* them each in several quarter.
        Here lies the no less politic than stout
        Italian force; and there your sprightly French;
        Here the brave Spaniard; there the German bold;*
        Here the Polonian; and Sclavonian there;
        Persian and Grecian*―――

254VictoriaPray thee hold. No more.

255Borgio’Tis not your house can hold (would I admit ’em)
        One of each several nation would throng in
        To make his battery on your virgin fort*.
        The rich piazza on her greatest mart
        Boasts not more nations, nor St. Mark* himself
        The understanding of more languages*
        Than I (could I find house-room) could receive,
        To be made one by your interpretation*.
        O what a daring glass is sparkling beauty,
        Fetching ambition from above the pitch
        Of tow’ring eagles, or sky-touching larks
        Down with a glance* into the nets of love*!

256VictoriaPray thee, speak nearer home*: who hast thou housed?

257BorgioI have culled from the pack* a special prince;
        Four glittering gallants; one of Italy,
        For our dear country’s sake; but then a Monsieur,
        A jovial Frenchman, all of flame and spirit.

258VictoriaI shall not dare to meddle with his glory*
        For fear I fall with Semele*. Who next?

259BorgioA Spaniard next, that, to adorn his pride,
        Wears an epitome of both the Indies*.

260VictoriaI saw his punctuality pass by.

261BorgioAnd did you note his stiff reservedness?
        He dares not cough for breaking of his chain.
        But then there is a Dutchman, (cargo lustig*!)
        A jolly strong-chinned German, princely born
        (A Landsgrave at the least) whose very bluntness
        Promises more than the sharp-set Italian,
        The fiery Frenchman or the doughty Diego*
        In all their eager pursuit.

262VictoriaThat man, Borgio!
        You have bestowed them all in several rooms?

263BorgioOh like fierce beasts: from scent* of one another*!

264VictoriaThen first (in fair requital of the music
        I do imagine some of them bestowed
        On me this morning) ere my love appears
        To feed their eyes, let music feast their ears*.All exit

Edited by Professor Richard Cave