THE
QUEEN’S
EXCHANGE:
A
COMEDY

The Persons in the Play.*

BERTHA,* Queen of West Saxons.
KELRIC,* ELKWIN,* ELFRID,* three sycophant Lords in Queen Bertha’s Court.
SEGEBERT,* a Lord banished by Queen Bertha.*
THEODRIC, King Osric’s Favourite and Ambassador.
ANTHYNUS and OFFA,* Segebert’s sons.
MILDRED,*Segebert’s daughter.*
OSRIC,* King of Northumbria.
THEODWALD, EAUFRID,* ALFRID,* EDELBERT,* Lords of King Osric’s Council.
4 CLOWNS.†
JEFFREY, the King’s Fool.*
A CONSTABLE.
ETHELSWIC, Theodric’s substitute in Osric’s affections.
A PHYSICIAN.
3 OUTLAWS.
A HERMIT and his SERVANT.
EDITH,* Mildred’s Nurse.
ARNOLD, an old servant of Offa.
A CARPENTER, A MASON and A SMITH, three Thieves.
KEEPER of Prison.

Scene England.

Prologue* to the Queens Exchange.


The writer of this play, who ever† uses
        To usher with his modesty the Muses†
        Unto the stage, he that scarce ever durst†
        Of poets rank himself above the worst,
        Though most that he has writ has passed†the rest,
        And found good approbation† of the best,
        He, as he never knew to bow, he says,
        As little fears the fortune of his plays.
        He yields their right to us, and we submit
        All that they are in learning or in wit
        To your fair censure.† All is then but thus:
        As you approve, they are good or bad to us;
        And all by way of favour we can crave
        Is that you not destroy where you may save.
ACT ONE
1.1*
Hautboys† [sound offstage].
Enter KELRICK, ELKWIN, [ELFRID],* SEGEBERT, BERTHA and Attendants.


3BerthaSince it has pleased the highest Power to place me
        His substitute in regal sovereignty,
        Over this kingdom, by the general vote
        Of you, my loyal Lords and loving subjects,
        Though grounded on my right of due succession,
        Being immediate heir, and only child
        Of your late, much deplored king, my father,
        I am in a most reverend duty bound
        Unto that Power above me, and a well-
        Befitting care towards you my faithful people,
        To rule and govern so (at least so near
        As by all possibility I may)
        That I may shun Heaven's anger, and your grief.
        Which that I may, at our last consultation,
        The better to pass through my weighty charge,
        I gave you to consider of the proposition
        Is made to me by the Northumbrian king
        Of marriage, not only to enable me
        In my government, but thereby to strengthen
        This kingdom in succeeding times, by a line
        Of lawful successors. I gave you all
        My strong and most unanswerable reasons,
        To which you seemed contented, all but one,
        Who with the rest by this I hope is satisfied.
        ’Tis you, Lord Segebert, you it is I mean.
        Does it appear to you yet reasonable,
        That I be matched to the Northumbrian king?
        I have with patience waited a whole month
        For you to rectify your scrupulous judgement,
        Whereby it might comply with these, no way
        Inferior to your self, but are your peers,
        As well in their known wisdom, as my favour.

4SegebertThus low unto your sacred Majesty
        I here devote† myself; and thus I meet
        With equal love, th’ embraces of these Lords.
        I’ll join and grow one body and one voice
        With them, in all may add unto your honour,
        And your dear kingdom’s good. But pardon me,
        My sovereign Queen, and I beseech you, my Lords,
        To weigh with your known wisdom the great danger
        This match may bring unto the crown and country.
        ‘Tis true, the King Osric as well in person
        As in his dignity, may be thought fit
        To be endowed with all you seem to yield† him;
        But what becomes of all the wholesome† laws,
        Customs, and all the nerves of government
        Your no less prudent than majestic father
        With power and policy enriched this land with
        And made the Saxons happy, and yourself
        A queen of so great eminence. Must all,
        With so much majesty and matchless beauty,
        Be now subjected to a stranger’s foot
        And trod into disorder? All your wealth,
        Your state,† your laws, your subjects, and the hope
        Of flourishing future fortunes, which your father
        By his continual care and tedious† study
        Gave as a legacy unto this kingdom,
        Must all be altered, or quite subverted,†
        And all by a wilful gift unto a stranger?

5BerthaPeace! Stop his mouth! Unreverend old man,
        How durst* thou thus oppose thy sovereign’s will,
        So well approved by all thy fellow peers,
        Of which the meanest† equals thee in judgement?

6SegebertDo you approve their judgements, Madam, which
        Are grounded on your will:* I may not do’t.
        Only† I pray that you may understand
        (But not unto your loss) the difference
        Betwixt smooth flattery and honest judgements.

7BerthaDo you hear this, my Lords?

8KelricMy Lord Segebert,
        Though you except† against this king,
        He may hereafter thank you in your kind.

9SegebertMeantime I thank you for your prophecy.

10Kelric*You cannot but allow succession is
        The life of kingdoms; and if so, you cannot
        But wish the Queen (which Heaven grant speedily)
        An happy† husband.

11BerthaI thank you, good my Lord.

12ElkwinAnd if an husband, why not him she affects?†
        Can it befit a subject to control
        The affection of his princess? Heaven forbid!

13SegebertThis is ear-taking music.

14ElkwinOr suppose,
        You might control it: whom in your great wisdom
        Would you allot* the Queen?

15SegebertI see your aim
        And know, when I have said all that I dare,
        What censure I must undergo. And thus
        I’ll meet it boldly: you are sycophants† all,
        And do provide but for yourselves, though all
        The kingdom perish for’t. May the justice
        That follows flattery overtake you for’t.

16[Bertha]*Take hence the madman.

17Kelric*   [To SEGEBERT]   We are sorry for you.

18ElkwinAnd wish the troublesome spirit were out of you,
        That so distracts your reason.

19ElfridWe have known you
        Speak and answer to the purpose.

20Segebert   [To ELKWIN]   Your question to no purpose, sir, was this:
        Whom my great wisdom would allot the Queen?
        You are not worth my answer.   [To BERTHA]   But my sovereign,
        I do implore your gracious attention
        To these few words.

21KelricLess sense.

22ElfridNo matter.

23ElkwinSilence.
        Speak your few words: the Queen can give you hearing.

24Segebert   [To BERTHA]   I wish Your Highness would command your women,
        That know their qualities, to take up your beagles.
        Their petulances sort† not with this place
        Nor the more serious matter of my speech.

25BerthaSpeak: I can hear you through.* Forbear† him, Lords.

26SegebertThe King your father, and my ne’er*-to-be-
        Forgotten master — please you to remember,
        Although his memory be lost with these
        Who ne’er* had grace to know him rightly — gave me
        Before his death strictly† this charge,† and in
        Your presence too, charging your self withal
        To give it due obedience: that you should
        Before all men’s advice take mine for marriage;
        And that especially I should take care
        ’Gainst innovation, that* the laws he left
        Established with such care for good o’th’* kingdom
        Might be maintained by whomsoe’er* you matched with.
        I know, and you, if you knew anything,
        Might know the difference ‘twixt the Northumbrian laws
        And ours; and sooner will their king pervert†
        Your privileges and your government,
        Than reduce† his to yours: pure common sense —
        Even you, methinks, my Lords — may foretell that.

27BerthaYou have said enough.

28SegebertI do beseech your Highness
        But for this little more.

29BerthaI’ll hear no more.

30KelricPray hear his little more although you send him
        Out of your hearing then for evermore.

31SegebertYour father added this to his command:
        That rather than by marriage you should bring
        Your subjects to such thraldom,† and that if
        No prince whose laws cohered† with yours did seek you
        (As some there are, and nearer than th’ Northumbrian)
        That he would have you from some noble stock†
        To take a subject in your own dominion.

32BerthaTraitor!

33SegebertTo urge your father’s testament?

34KelricBut did the King, your ne’er*-forgotten master,
        Bequeath her an affection to such blood?

35BerthaForbear.† Now he’s not worth your speaking to.

36Kelric   [Aside]   Now she’ll ha’ me, I hope. What a foul beast
        Was I to undervalue subject’s blood?

37BerthaI have forborne† you long, for the old love
        My father in his life conferred upon you
        And still I yield to it so much as saves
        Your head, bold-talking fellow. But, sir, hear
        Your doom.† Since the King’s love hath puffed your dotage†
        With swollen conceit† (for what can it be less?)
        That you are now my King (for sure you think so)
        I’ll try† my title with you. Hence, you exile!
        Go in perpetual banishment from this kingdom.
           [To KELRIC, ELKWIN and ELFRID]   Speak not a word for him.

38[Kelric, Elkwin and Elfrid]*In sooth,† we meant it not.

39KelricBut may it please Your Majesty, you mentioned
        His head erewhile.† Now, if I might advise--

40BerthaAway, you’ll be too cruel.

41Kelric   [Aside]   Another hope lost.

42ElkwinHis lands and goods, Madam, would be thought on.

43BerthaNo, he has children.

44ElfridI’ll take his daughter with all faults, and half his lands.

45Bertha   [To SEGEBERT]   Why are ye not gone?

46SegebertI have not much to say.

47BerthaOut with it, then, and then out with yourself!

48SegebertIn the large history of your father’s life
        You find but one example for this doom†
        Of banishment, and that was of Alberto* five years since,
        For wronging me unto His Highness, when
        He stood in competition with me for
        The honour† in the state† the King then gave me.

49BerthaAnd what of this?

50SegebertBut thus: I stood by then, and then all-knowing Heaven
        Saw that though he for wronging me was banished,
        I was right sorry, and much pleaded for him.

51BerthaIt follows now that you would have these lords,
        Whom you have so abused,† to plead for you.

52SegebertQuite contrary, for they are my abusers.
        Yet I do grieve for them, but more for you,
        To think on all your sorrows, when too late
        You’ll wish for me to steer the state.†

53BerthaPray, if you meet that good old lord Alberto
        Now in your exile, send him home to us:
        I’ll promise him your honour in the state.†

54AllHa, ha, ha!

55BerthaGo from my sight, and if after three days
        Thou art seen in my dominion, I will give
        A thousand crowns* to him that brings thy head.
        See proclamation sent to that effect.

56KelricI will, and as many informers after
        The proclamation, as there be crowns in’t.
           [To SEGEBERT]   Come, we have spoken for you all that we can.

57ElfridThe Queen’s implacable.

58BerthaBe gone, I say! Why dost thou stay?

59SegebertBut† to applaud your mercy and bounty,
        In that you post† me from a world of care
        And give me the wide world for my shareSEG[EBERT] and KELR[IC] exit.

60ElkwinYour Majesty has performed† a point of justice,
        Mingled with clemency,† beyond all precedent.*

61BerthaEnough to give a warning to all such
        As dare oppose their princes’ purposes.
        Conduct in now th’ ambassador of Northumbria.ELKW[IN] and ELF[RID] exit.*
        Whilst I   [studying portrait of Osric]*   review his master’s brighter figure†
        As ardently (but with more pure affection)
        As e’er* did Cynthia her Endymion.*
Ent[er THEODRIC with ELKWIN and ELFRID]

           [To Theodric]   My Lord, you have attended long, but now
        I shall return that answer to your King
        That, if his love be as you have pretended,
        May well excuse your stay. Tell him this story,
        A king sent forth a general to besiege
        A never-conquered city. The siege was long,
        And no report came back unto the king,
        How well or ill his expedition thrived,
        Until his doubtful thoughts had given lost,
        His hope o’th’ city and his army both.
        When he being full of this despair, arrived
        O’th’ sudden his brave general with victory,
        Which made his thanks, as was his conquest, double.
        You may interpret me, my Lord.

62TheodricIf so,
        I am to tell the King he has won your love.

63BerthaA blush may be excused in the confession.
        ’Tis my first answer to the question: yes.

64TheodricSo from the doubtful darkness of the night,
        The blushing morn ushers the cheerful sun
        To give new light and life unto the world.
        I shall revive my king with these glad tidings.

65BerthaYou have said well: let us inform you better.*
[BERTHA takes THEODRIC to one side and confers privately with him]*

66ElkwinI can but think what old Segebert said
        Concerning laws, customs, and privileges,
        And how this match will change the government.
        I fear, howe’er the laws may go, our customs will
        Be lost, for he, methinks, out-flatters us already.

67ElfridHe’s the King’s favourite,† and has wooed so well
        For him, that we may fear he’ll wriggle in
        ‘Twixt him and us, the prime man in her favour.

68Bertha   [To THEODRIC]   Let it be so. The tenth of the next month
        I’ll be prepared to entertain His Highness,
        First to confirm a contract, then as soon
        As he shall please, to consummate our marriage.
        In the mean time this figure,† which you say
        Resembles him, as painter’s skill affords —
        Indeed, it is a sweet one!   (Kisses it)   — shall be daily
        My dear companion most unseparably;
        And when I sleep, it shall partake my pillow.
        Does he love mine as well d’ye think, my Lord?

69TheodricJust with the same devotion. If I durst,†
        I would say more.

70BerthaNay, speak, my Lord, pray speak!

71TheodricHe does* allow’t a table, waiters and officers†
        That eat the meat.

72BerthaIndeed!

73Elkwin   [Aside]   Oh horrible!

74Elfrid   [Aside]   Nay, we shall ne’er* come near him!

75TheodricAnd at night
        He lodges it perpetually on his bosom.

76Elkwin   [Aside]   We are dunces to him.

77TheodricHere, just here —   [THEODRIC] shrugs.   
        And’t please Your Majesty — o’ the heart’s side.

78BerthaIndeed I am pleased! I’ll stay† you but tonight:
        Tomorrow you shall hasten towards the King,
        And for your speed wear this.

79TheodricMost gracious queen.[THEODORIC] kisses her hand.
[THEODRIC, BERTHA, KELRIC, ELKWIN, ELFRID,and Attendants exit.]*
1.2*
Enter SEGEBERT, ANTHYNUS,* OFFA [and] MILDRED.

80Segebert’Tis the Queen’s pleasure, children: I must bear it.

81OffaTo banishment, good heaven forbid!*
        And Heaven I hope will not yet suffer it.

82SegebertWhilst we expect the best from Heaven’s high will,
        It suffers princes to reward us ill.
        Yet can I think it shakes an angry hand
        Over my head for some misdeed of mine,
        Which I have unrepented let go by.
        It must be something sure was pleasure to me.
        What in the world has most delighted me?
        To love my king and country, neighbours, friends,
        And sometimes enemies. (I’ll pass o’er* that.)
        I have done well (though I do not to boast it)
        To succour and relieve all kind of wretches,
        Poor souls that have half deafened me with prayers,
        Loud prayers. They’ll miss me now, and I
        Shall have amiss† of them* too. (Let that pass.)
        What have I done at home, since my wife died?
        No turtle ever kept a widowhood
        More strict* than I have done. Then, for my children:
        Offa, come you hither.

83OffaMy lord father.

84Anthynus   [Aside]   He might have called me first: I am the eldest.

85SegebertI am sure thou’lt answer in behalf of one.
        Have I not loved thee always?

86OffaO dear sir,
        I am all unworthy to acknowledge half,
        Half of your pious† bounties on a son,
        A wretch so ill deserving as myself.
        Your hand has evermore been open to me,
        Your blessings still more readily have showered
        Upon my head than I had grace to ask them.
           [Aside]*   For to my knowledge I ne’er* asked blessing yet
        With a good will in all my life: some would
        Do penance in the church with less perplexity.†

87SegebertAye, thou wast ever an obedient child.
           [To MILDRED]   Next, you, my daughter.

88Anthynus   [Aside]   Then I must be last.

89SegebertHow have you found my love?

90MildredSir, far above my duty.   [MILDRED] weeps.*   

91SegebertDo not weep, but speak, good child.
        I have not long to stay with ye: my three days
        Will scarce afford this hour to bide with you.

92MildredHad I no tears nor sobs to interrupt
        My flattering tongue, but had speech as free
        As the best orator that speaks for fee
        Could, or durst I attempt t’express your goodness
        More than to say, ’tis more than I can say —

93Segebert’Tis a good maid!   [Aside]   O Queen, thou art too cruel!

94MildredBut honour’d father, grant me yet one boon.*

95SegebertWhat’s that, my girl?

96MildredYou shall know presently.†
[MILDRED] dries her eyes.

        Pray give me leave to kneel unto the Queen
        To try what I can do for your repeal.
        ’Twere shame we should sit down and lose you thus.
        The Queen affects† me well. You know she loves me
        And promised once she would deny me nothing.

97SegebertFor this thou shalt not trouble her. Besides,
        You put me well in mind to charge† you, daughter,
        Upon my blessing, go no more to Court.
        Shun it, I charge thee, as thou wouldst my curse.
        If you have lovers there whom they call servants,
        Do as neat† surgeons do when they have touched
        Loathsome or pestilent sores: wash clean your hands
        Of all of ’em, that are far more infectious.
        And hear me, daughter Mildred: I am told
        The Northumbrian ambassador now at Court,
        The great King’s greater favourite,† made hot love to you.
        And that he obtained your picture, which he wears
        More proud of’t than his undeserved honours.
        Let me now charge you further, and observe it:
        Shake off all thoughts of him. Upon the match now
        He and whole shoals*† of upstart braveries,†
        Must hither needs attend their King. But if
        Thou marry with him, or any amongst them,
        Though the greatest subject that his master has,
        Thou art divorced forever of my blessing.

98MildredI will in all obey you.

99OffaI shall look to that, sir.

100SegebertEnough. Anthynus!

101Anthynus   [Aside]   At last, yet I am thought on.

102SegebertNow there rests†
        Of all my children but you to resolve me:
        How you have found my love?

103AnthynusYou ask me last,
        Sir, I presume, ’cause you have had me longest,
        To crown their testimony.

104SegebertYet you seem,
        Anthynus, by your leave, the least to know me,
        But like a stranger look upon me when
        These give me due respect.

105AnthynusLess than due
        I dare not give you, and more were to abuse you.
        Though I do not applaud, I must approve†
        You are a right good father.

106OffaUmh.

107SegebertYet you speak in this but coldly.

108Offa   [To SEGEBERT]*   No, no, it sounds not well. But you are wise.

109AnthynusI have observed, but specially at Court,
        Where flattery is too frequent, the great scorn
        You have ever cast upon it, and do fear
        To come within such danger of reproof,
        Knowing your reason may as well detest it
        In your own house, as in kings’ palaces.
        And when I hear another (my dear sister,
        Heaven knows* I mean not you!)
        Speak like a flatterer, I hold my peace,
        And so come short of doing what I would,
        For fear of overdoing. But, honoured sir,
        When a son can be found that dares do more
        For’s father’s life or honour than myself,
        I’ll forfeit mine inheritance and your blessing.
        So much your love engages† me.

110Offa   [To SEGEBERT]   If this were hearty now, not hollow.

111SegebertNo more!
        Time calls away apace, and I am satisfied,
        Since I must undergo the Queen’s hard censure,†
        That it falls not upon me like a curse,
        For wronging crown or country, neighbours, friends,
        Or you my dearer children. I will take it
        Not as a punishment, but blessing rather,
        To be removed from miseries
        Are like to fall on this unhappy kingdom.
        And I will think the Queen has done me favour
        To ease me of my cares a thousand ways,
        To make my rest of life all holidays.†
        Now take my last directions. Son Anthynus.

112Anthynus   [Aside]   "Son"! It is holiday* with me too. ’Tis
        The first time he called me "Son" these three years.

113SegebertThough you are eldest, and my lawful heir,
        And must be lord at my decease of all
        My large possessions, yet it is my will
        That till my death my Offa have the sway†
        And government of all, allowing you
        That yearly stipend† formerly I gave you.
        Let me not hear of any grudge betwixt you.
        And be you both respectful† of your sister,
        And you of them, good girl. It is decreed
        That I shall never see you more.

114MildredAy me.   [MILDRED weeps.]*   

115SegebertGo, get thee in, I prithee, Mildred!
        Go in, I say, thy brothers shall a little
        Shew me my way. Go in, I shall not speak else,
        And I have more to say to them. Good, now go!

116Mildred   [Sobbing]   O, O, O.[MILDRED starts to exit but returns.]

117SegebertYou will not disobey me? Heaven bless my girl!

118MildredBut must I never see you more?

119SegebertYes, child, in heaven, and then for evermore.

120MildredTo wait your coming thither I’ll afore.*Exit [MILDRED].

121SegebertThither shall be my first journey, but after.†*
           [To OFFA and ANTHYNUS]   You shall still† hear from me where’er* I wander.

122AnthynusNot I, sir, by your favour.

123SegebertWhy, I pray?

124AnthynusI must be nearer you. I kneel for’t, sir,
        And humbly pray I may not be denied
        To wait on you in exile. Take me with you.

125Offa   [To SEGEBERT]   Do you not find† him?

126SegebertThis is but your stoutness†
        (Though you seem humble unto me) against
        Your brother, because I leave the rule to him.

127AnthynusFar be it from my thoughts, dear sir! Consider
        He has had that rule already divers years
        E’er* since my mother died,* and been your darling,
        Heaven knows without my grudge, while you were pleased.

128Offa   [To SEGEBERT]   Heaven knows his thoughts the while, alack a day!

129AnthynusI never envied him, though I have found
        You have severely overlooked† my actions,
        When you have smiled on his, though but the same.
        I have been still content while I have found my duty firm.

130SegebertYou shall along.

131AnthynusYou have new begotten me!

132OffaSir!

133SegebertPeace: I know thy fear, my dearest boy.

134OffaDoes not your blood begin to chill within you?
        Great heirs are overhasty, sir,
        And think their fathers live too long. Pray, sir
        Take heed of him. Though he should act the
        Parricide abroad, our laws acquit him.

135SegebertI’ll give myself to Heaven: quit thou thy fear.
        I am not worth a life. I’ll take him hence
        That thou mayst be secure from bloody spite.
        I fear him not. Mischief has spent herself
        And left her sting within me for a charm*
        That quits* me from the fear of further harm.
        Go get thee home: my blessing and farewell!

136OffaPray, sir, excuse me, I cannot speak   (Aside)*   for laughing.

137SegebertAnd farewell, country! Shed not a tear for me.
        I go to be dissolved in tears for thee.[SEGEBERT, ANTHYNUS and OFFA exit.]

Edited by Marion O'Connor