ACT V. SCENE I.
Enter Swayn-wit, Court-wit, Cit-wit.
Sw.Come Sir, muſt I take you in hand agen?
Cit.My Lady will convery her Madman to ſir
Andrew Mendicants it ſeemes.
Sw.Tell me that I know not: and anſwer my
Cit.Shee and the Doctor, and the tother Doctor’s
Sw.Leave you by flim flams, and ſpeake to the pur-
Cit.You know I ha’ ſworne. Doe you not know I ha’
Sw.To live and die a beaten Aſſe; a coward haſt thou
Cou.Prethee forbeare him: Hee’s not worth thy
Sw.Anger! Is every Schoole-maſter angry that gives
Diſcipline with correction?
Cit.Would he were at
Penſans agen.
Sw.Didſt not thou tell my Lady that I was a coward
in my own Countrey, and Kick’d out of Cornewall?
[R6]Cit.
The Court Begger.
Cit.Comparatively I thinke I did in reſpect of
Corine-
us, that wraſtled and threw
Giant after
Giant over the
Sw.Pox o’ your comparative lies; And didſt not
thou ſay that he here was pepper’d ſo full o’ the what-
ſha callums, that his ſpittle would poyſon a Dog or a
Cit.That was comparatively too in reſpect of a pure
Virgin; a chriſome child or ſo.
Cou.He never ſhall move me, I forgive him.
Cit.Meerly comparatively I ſpeake it.
Sw.Forgi’ mee for ſwearing i’le make thee ſpeake
poſitively, or beat thee ſuperlatively before I ha’ done
Enter Boy.
Sw.Hold a little. Didſt thou not ſay this child here
was a Pickpocket? and that he pickt thine of thy money,
and thy watch, when he was ſinging betweene thy Leggs
Boy.Who I a Pick-pocket?
Flies at him.
Cit.Forbeare good Lady it was comparatively.
Cou.Forbeare and hear him
Hercules.
Boy.Lend me a ſword i’le kill him, and heare him a-
Cou.Nay I muſt hold you then. How was hee
comparatively your Pick-pocket?
Cit.That is as much as any man I know; That is I
accuſe nobody; that is all are as innocent as the child,
and hee as the innocent unborne. And let that ſatiſfy
Boy.Live. I am ſatisfied. Now Gentlemen my
Andrew Mendi-
cants.Andrew Mendi-
[R6v]Cou.
The Court Begger.
Cou.I know the buſineſſe, ’Tis about our Revells.
Sw.Suffer a child to beat thee!
Cou.His cauſe was bad you know.
Sw.Incorrigible coward! Say now; art not thou thy
ſelfe a pick-pocket, and a cut-purſe? ſay.
Cit.Comparatively it may be ſaid, I am to a Church-
warden, a Collector for the poore or ſuch.
Sw.The concluſion is, that if ever I heare thou men-
tionſt my name agen in any ſenſe whatſoever, i’le beat
Cit.In my good wiſhes, and prayers I may: Heaven
Sw.Not in your prayers ſir, ſhall you mention me, you
Cit.Heaven forbid I ſhould then!
Sw.And make thine Oath good on that ſlie fellow
that has taine away thy wench, or—
Cit.He has not tane her yet.
Cou.You ha’ not ſeene her or him theſe two houres;
has not my Lady call’d too, and ſhee not to be
Cit.True, true: and if I be not reveng’d.
Sw.Do’t then now, while thou art hot. Shee comes,
here take, and keepe her while thou art hot and haſt
Enter Philomel and Dainty.
Phi.Is ſhe at your diſpoſe ſir?
(Court takes
Cit.Your Lady gave you me.
(aſide with
Phi.Or am in her gift?
(Dainty.
Cit.You are in my poſſeſſion, nor ſhall
Lucifer dis-
Phi.So valiant on a ſodaine!
Phi.You’l have me with all faults?
Cit.Yes, and a match forever.
Kiſſe.
[R7]Sw.
The Court Begger.
Sw.How meanes ſhee by all faults?
Cit.A word ſhee alwayes uſes in waggery.
Cou.By all meanes take her from him. What! affraid
Sw.You muſt do’t or take the ſhare, hee ſhould ha’
had a down-right beating. Forgi’ me for ſwearing, hee’s
a veryer coward then tother.
Cou.Hee will ſerve the betrer to fleſh him. And do
but note his tiranicall rage that is the vanquiſher.
Dai.Sir ſhee is mine by promiſe.
Cit.Shee’s mine by act and deed ſir according to the
fleſh, let her deny’t and ſhe can.
Dai.That ſhall be try’d by Law.
Cit.By Law of armes and hands it ſhall, take that, and
Dai.Beare witneſſe Gentlemen he ſtruck me.
Phi.O pittifull Picture-drawer!
Cit.Will you not draw? I will then.
Draw.
Dai.What would you have ſir? If ſhee be yours take
Cit.That’s not enough, I will make thee fight, what
blindneſſe have I liv’d in! I would not but be valiant to
Cou.O brave
Cit, O brave
Cit.
Sw.Why doſt not draw thou fellow thou?
Dai.Shee’s his he ſayes; and ſhe denies it not, ſhall
I fight againſt him for his own?
Cit.I’le make thee fight, or cut thee into pieces.
Cou.He turnes your words over to him.
Cit.Why doſt thou weare a ſword? onely to hurt
mens feet that Kick thee?
Kisse,
Cou.Doe you obſerve? Nay thou art too ſevere.
Cit.Pray hold your peace, i’le jowle your heads together
and ſo beat ton with tother elſe.
[R7v]Sw.
The Court Begger.
Sw.Forgi’ me for ſwearing. Hee’l beat’s all anon.
Cit.VVhy doſt thou weare a Sword I ſay?
Dai.Some other time ſir, and in fitter place.
Cit.Sirrah you lie, ſtrike me for that, or I will beat thee
Dai.You ſee this Gentlemen.
Phi.And I ſee’t too, was ever poor wench ſo couzend
Cit.The wench thou lov’ſt and doat’ſt on is a whore.
Cit.No, no, That was not right, your father was a
cuckold tho’, and you the ſonne of a whore.
Sw.Good, I ſhall love this fellow.
Dai.I can take all this upon account.
Cit.You count all this is true then. Incorrigible cow-
ard! what was the laſt vile name you call’d mee
Mr.
Swain-wit? O I remember, ſirrah thou art a Pick-
pocket and a Cut-purſe; And gi’ me my money agen, and
him his or I will cut thy throat.
Cit.Doe you anſwer nothing, doe you demurre
Dai.Hold ſir I pray; Gentlemen ſo you will grant
me pardon, and forbeare the Law i’le anſwer you.
Dai.It is confeſs’d; I am a Cut-purſe.
Cit.Comparatively or poſitively doe you ſpeake?
Speake poſitively, or I will beat thee ſuperlatively.
Sw.Forgi’ me for ſwearing a brave Boy.
Dai.Here is your VVatch, and Money: And here is
yours. Now as you are Gentlemen uſe no extremity.
Cou.Beyond all expectation!
Cit.Miraculous! O the effects of valour!
Phi.Was ever woman ſo miſtaken o’ both ſides?
[R8]Sw.
The Court Begger.
Sw.But doſt thou thinke thou art valiant for all this
Cit.You were beſt try; or you, or both, or come all
Sw.I ſweare thou ſhalt have it to keepe up while thou
Cit.Is this your picture-drawing? are you the Kings
Picture-drawer? A neat denomination for a Cut-purſe,
that drawes the Kings Pictures out of mens Pockets.
Cou.Come ſir, come in with us.
Dai.Pray uſe me Kindly Gentlemen.
Cit.Yes, wee will uſe you in your kind ſir.
Takes Phil. by the hand. Exeunt Omnes.
ACT V. SCENE II.
Enter Mendicant, a Letter in his hand.
Men.This is the day of my felicity,
And is the ſame with that the Poet Sings
Is better then an Age. Come forth
Chariſſa.
Enter Chariſſa.
Now you appeare my comfort; and I can
No leſſe then thanke thy ſweet obedience
That haſt comply’d with my directions,
Bride-like and glorious to meet a fortune,
So great as ſhall beget the preſent envy
Of all the Virgin Ladies of the Court,
And a poſterity, that through all ages,
Shall praiſe and magnify thy act.
Cha.Your acceptation of my duty ſir
Is all that I can glory in.
Men.How are we bound unto this noble Lady
R8vThat
The Court Begger.
That ſent us our inſtructions.
Cha.Sure I am. If this be a true Coppy.
Men.Let
Muſick in her ſoft but ſweeteſt notes
Uſher their welcome, whilſt unto my thoughts
Muſick.
The lowdeſt harmony reſounds my triumph.
Enter Doctor, and Fred. in Doctors habit, Strange. Prieſt,
Ferd. in the chair as before borne by ſervants,
Fab. as one of the ſervants.
Str.In feweſt and the ſofteſt words ſir
Andrew.
(He ſleepes) and let him gently be convey’d
Onely with thoſe about him to his Chamber.
Men.Chariſſa, go; be you his conduct, ſoftly, ſoftly,
I ſee y’ave brought a Prieſt Madam.
Ext. Om. Pret.
Str.By all beſt reaſon,
Mend. & Strang.
For when we found he us’d
Chariſſa’s Name,
When he was calme and gentle, calling ſtill
Chariſſa! Where’s
Chariſſa? a good ſpace
Before he ſlept, and being then demanded
What would he with
Chariſſa? He moſt readily
Reply’d, Fetch me
Chariſſa and a Prieſt.
The Doctors in their judgements (unto which
My full opinion aſſented) might
Foreſee, that in removing him, where ſhe
Might be his immediat object, when he wakes,
That freſher flames to inſtant marriage
Men.Incomparably judicious Madam.
Str.Yet not without your leave would I attempt it;
Without your leave, knowing your watchfull care
Men.And that care of mine
Was (Madam) by your favour
Principall motive to this great effect.
S[1]Str.
The Court Begger.
Str.Take all unto your ſelfe, I am content.
Men.I’d faine ſteale in and watch th’ event of
Str.But have you heard ſir
Andrew the miſchance
Of the unfortunate Lover, diſtracted
Frederick?
Str.H’has made himſelfe away.
Str.(Hee has by this time, or the Prieſt is tongue-
Men.He has left no eſtate worth begging, that’s
My joyes come flowing no me — yet I would
Str.And heare me good Sir
Andrew, for the Love
I bring to ad unto your joyes: for I
Foreſeeing the event of this nights happineſſe
Have warn’d ſome friends to follow me with Revells
To celebrate the Marriage of your fortunes.
See they are come. Pray entertaine ’em ſir.
Enter Court. Swayn. Cit-wit, Dainty, Phil. Boy.
Men.The Gallants that were to day ſo merry with
Str.The ſame: but very harmleſſe.
Cit.All but one ſir. Did you not loſe your purſe to-day?
Cou. Sw.Wee’l tell you Madam.
Men.My purſe? (I miſt it at my Lady
Strangeloves.)
Cit.This Picture-drawer drew it, and has drawne
more of the Kings-pictures then all the Limners in the
Towne. Reſtore it ſirrah.
Men.I will not take it, ’twas my neglect that loſt it,
not he that ſtole it. This is my day of fortune; it comes
home to me; more then I dare receive. O my joyes, let
me be able to containe you.
[S1v]Cit.
The Court Begger.
Cit.Ha’ you another purſe to loſe?
Men.I have a purſe; which if I loſe, I’le blame my
Cit.Let him but come ſo neare you as to aſke forgive-
neſſe for the laſt, and if he doe not take the next, though
it be ſix fadome deepe i’ your pocket i’le hang for him
Men.I’le watch his fingers for that.
Sit.
Dai.Sir at your feet I beg your pardon
Men.It needs not, prithee riſe.
Dai.Never, till you pronounce that happy word
I pardon thee; or let me have ſome token
Of ſweet aſſurance that I am forgiven
Which I beſeech you–I beſeech you grant.
Men.In ſooth thou haſt it. Heaven pardon thee as
Dai.I have it ſir indeed, and as your gift i’le keepe it,
promiſing before all theſe witneſſes, i’le never venter for
Men.Fore me an expert fellow; Pitty he ſhould be
hang’d before we have more of his breed.
Cit.Did not I tell you ſir? And theſe are but his ſhort
armes; i’le undertake, when he makes a long arme, he ſhall
take a purſe twelve ſkore off.
Men.I doe not like Thieves handſell though, This may
preſage ſome greater loſſe at hand.
Sw.Now Gentlemen you know your taſke, be expediti-
Cou.I have caſt the deſigne for’t already Madam. My
inventions are all flame and ſpirit. But you can expect no
great matter to be done
extempore or in ſix minutes.
Sw.What matter iſt ſo wee ſkip up and downe? our
friend
Jack Dainty here, Mr Cut-purſe dances daintily
S 2Str.
The Court Begger.
Str.And Mr.
Cit-wit, you have worthily wonne my
Cit.I have her Madam, ſhe is mine.
Str.I’le make her worth a thouſand pound to you,
beſides all ſhe has of her own.
Cit.Her faults and all Madam, we are agreed o’ that.
Phi.Suppoſe this Boy be mine.
Cit.I would he were elſe, that I might have him under
lawfull correction, and the cauſe o’ my ſide; for he beat
Boy.And you be my father, and do not make much of
me and give me fine things, i’le beat you agen ſo I will;
and my mother ſhall helpe me.
Cit.Agree’d
Billy, agreed
Philly. Never was man ſo
ſodainly, ſo rich; Nay never looke Gentlemen, ſhee is
mine, and hee’s mine own, I am ſure I ha’ got him now;
And all faults are ſalv’d.
Sw.Her word in waggery is made good in earneſt
Str.To your buſines Gentlemen; if you have a
(They
ſhort ſpeech or two, the boy’s a prety Actor; and
(con-
his mother can play her part; women-Actors now
(ſult.
grow in requeſt. Sir
Andrew! melancholly?
Men.I was thinking on the
omen of my purſe.
(Court
Str.Fear no further miſhap ſir; tis ominous
(draws his
to feare.
(Tables and retires to
Men.Pray let’s go in and ſee how
(Phil. writes & ſome-
things proceed.
(times ſhewes her.
Str.Pray give mee leave to make the firſt diſcovery;
Walke downe into the Garden, i’le come to you;
And here are ſome would ſpeak with you.
Ex. ſeverally.
Enter two Projectors.
I.Into the Garden, good, let’s follow him.
2.Tis not the repulſe he gave us in the morning ſhall quit him of us.
[S2v]1.No
The Court Begger.
I.No now his ſuperintendent’s turn’d away, wee’l once
more fill his head with millions.
Exit.
Dai.I’le make the Dance, and give you all
(Practiſe
Sw.Stand further off o’ my Pocket tho’.
Cit.No matter if we loſe any thing, and he within ten
miles of us i’le make him anſwer’t.
Dai.I want a fiſt man, I would have an od.
Enter Doctor.
Doc.The Marriage is perform’d. The Prieſt has done
Doc.And ſing too, I ha’ forgot much elſe.
Phi.I’le ſpeak the Speech: Ha’ not I forgot my Actors
tone tro? I ſhal remember’t, I could have acted ’em all ore.
Boy.I can ſpeak a Speech too Mother, muſt I call you
Phi.I my Boy, now I dare vouch thee.
Doc.What think you of this tune ſir for your dance?
Dai.I’le borrow a Violl and take it of you inſtantly.
Ex.
Enter ſir Raphael.
Pray ſir, is
ſir Andrew Mendicant i’the houſe.
(To Court-w.
Cou.Umh–
(He writes in his tables, ſometimes ſcratch-
(ing his head, as pumping his Muſe.
Is he within ſir, can you tell? He’s too buſie it ſeemes.
Can you tell me ſir I pray, if ſir
To Cit-wit as he mov’d
Andrew be within?
toward him, Cit-wit
Very ſtrange! among what Nati-
Dances looking on his
on am I arriv’d?
Feete,&c.
Here’s one in civill habit ſure will anſwer me,
Sir may I be inform’d by you? ſaw you ſir
Andrew?
The Doctor
Ra.Te precor domine Doctorſtretches his
They are no Chriſtians ſure.
} He ſings on. Throat in the
Tune.
S 3Sir
The Court Begger.
Sir may I be inform’d by you?
(To Swayn. He whiſtels &
Bleſſe me; the people are bewitch’d.
(Dances Sellingers
(round, or the like.
Enter Dainty.
Do you belong to the houſe ſir?
To Dainty, he fidls to him
& the 4 Dancing & ſing-
I hope for curteſie here Lady will
ing practiſe about him.
you be pleas’d —
To Phil. ſhe ſpeaks in a vile tone like
a Player.
Phi.O by no meanes, we muſt ſpeake
Charon faire,
Or hee’l not waft us o’re the
Stigian Floud,
Then muſt we have a ſop for
Cerberus
To ſtop his yawning Chaps; Let me alone
To be your Convoy to
Elizium.
Ra.This is moſt heatheniſh of all.
(Dainty playes ſoftly
Phi.I’le paſs that ſnarling triple-headed Cur
(& Doctor
Which keeps the pallace-gate of
Pluto’s Court,
(with him
And guide you ſafe through pitchy
Acheron.(aſide.
Ra.What Woman Monſter’s this? Sweete young
Gentleman, let me aſke you a queſtion.
Boy.Grim death, why rather didſt thou not approach
My younger dayes; before I knew thy feares?
Thy paines are multiplied by our yeares.
Ra.All Lunatick? or Gentlemen, do you want leaſure
Or civility to anſwer me?
Cit.Ha’ you done the ſpeeches Mr.
Court-wit?
Cou.I have already from the forked top
Of high
Parnaſſus fetcht ’em.
Cit.And ſhall my wife and
Billi boy ſpeake ’em?
Cou.As i’le inſtruct you.
Cit.You write admirably I confeſſe; But you have an
ill tone to inſtruct in; I’le read to ’em my ſelfe, you give
Doc.You have the tune right, will you inſtruct the
Dai.And you all in the Dance imediately.
[S3v]Sw.
The Court Begger.
Sw.But ſhall we have no ſilken things, no whim whams
Cit.Perhaps the Bride can furniſh us.
Sw.With ſome of her old Petticotes, can ſhe?
Phi.No, no, my Lady has tane care for all.
Dai.Come, come away to practiſe, and be ready.
Exe.
Ra.Never was I in ſuch a Wilderneſſe.
(Om. Fidling,
But my revenge upon Sir
Mendicant(Footing,
Shall anſwer all my patience, in the Jeere
(Singing,
I meane to put upon him.
(Acting, &c.
I will poſſeſſe him with a braine-trick, now,
A meere invention of mine own (wherein
Heaven pardon me for lying) ſhall ſo nettle him.
Enter Mendicant, and Projecters.
Men.Goe back and be not ſeene till I come to
Ra.Hee’s come. Ha’ you heard the newes, ſir
Andrew?
Ra.That
Ferdinand’s reſtor’d to’s wits.
Ra.Do you take the loſſe of his eſtate ſo mildly
Which might ha’ bin your own?
Men.I hope you think mee a Chriſtian, ſir, but how
ſhould he arrive at ſuch a ſodaine knowledge of it, if it
be ſo? I will pretend tis true, yes ſir, he is in’s wits.
Ra.I thought I had ly’d when I did propheſie:
But ſir my Nephew
Fredrick–
Men.Has made himſelfe away, I heard o’ that too.
Ra.(I hope not ſo) yet there’s another accident
Of which you have not heard, may touch you nearer,
And that indeed’s my buſineſſe, you ſir, furiouſly
Men.Not dangerouſly I hope.
Ra.Flatter not ſo your ſelfe; Hee’s on the point of
S 4Men.
The Court Begger.
Ra.Nor be too much dejected,
His life you may get off for (as ’twas done
In heat of blood) marry ſir your eſtate
(You’l pardon me) is beg’d; my ſelfe has don’t,
And therein, beg’d the Begger.
Ra.Take not too deepe a ſenſe of it: For if you’l yeild
That
Frederick yet ſhall have it with your Daughter,
Do you move this for a dead man?
Men.Do you practiſe on me? Madam where are
Enter Strang. Ferd. Fred. Chariſſa. Gabriel behind.
Str.Here ſir, and am become your Uſher to ſuch gueſts
As you muſt bid moſt welcome.
(Mend.
Ra.She here! i’m then agen confounded.
(ſtands
Str.Nay ſir
Raphael, I proteſt we will be friends
(amaz’d
notwithſtanding I have outſtript you in your plot of
matching your Nephew
Frederick, here to his love
Fre.It is, in which I hope ſir you are not offended,
Who gave me leave by any opportunity
To take her, I broke no locks nor walls for her.
Cha.I beg your pardon, and your bleſſing ſir.
Ra.And is it ſo with you ſir
Ferdinand?
Ferd.It is, and ſir in teſtimony of my recovery, I make
demand of my eſtate: of which you thought your ſelfe
Men.What hopes am I fallen from? and what miſery
fallen into; when the little I have is beg’d for Man-
[S4v]Gab.
The Court Begger.
Gab.I quit you of that ſir.
Men.How couldſt thou deale ſo with me?
Gab.To ſhew my gratitude.
You overpaid me for all my former ſervices,
For which I juſtly thought I ought you this.
Ferd.Nor thinke your Daughter undervalued ſir,
Three thouſand pound I give him to augment
Men.Dreames, dreames, All theſe are waking
Ferd.All reall truth ſir, whither flie you from us?
Men.Am I of all defeated; and by all
Abus’d and mock’d? More roome there: let mee
Ferd.You miſtake ſtrangely.
Floriſh.
Str.Harke! the Revellers.
Fer.That come to celebrate your joyes, which wilfully
Men.Tis all but ſhew, Let go, and I will do
Something ſhall ad to your delight imediatly.
Exit.
Str.Let him goe and weare out his fit by him-
Enter Boy, and Philomel, as Cupid and Venus.
Boy.Venus and
Cupid, my Mother and I–
Venus and
Cupid; my Mother and I
Helpe me agen; Noe, no, no.
Venus and
Cupid; my Mother and I,
Venus and
Cupid my Mother and I.
Ferd.There’s an Actor now!
Fre.How doubtfull of himſelfe; and yet how perfect
Ra.A ſelfe miſtruſt is a ſure ſtep to Knowledge.
[S5]Str.
The Court Begger.
Str.Sententious ſir
Raphel.
Ra.Quarrells are ended Madam.
Phi.From my
Italian Mount I did eſpy
(For what is hidden from a Deity?)
Howe faintly
Hymen did his Office here
Joyning two Lovers with the hand of feare;
Putting his Torch out for obſcurity;
And made the Chamber (which belongs to me)
His Temple. But from hence let feare remove.
See here, the Champions for the Queene of Love.
I.
Courage, ſent from
Mars; The Muſes kill.I Swain
2 Court
From wiſe
Apollo. And the God, which ſtill
Inſpires with ſubtilty, ſly
Mercury
Sends this his
Agent. Here’s
Activity4 Cit-wit.
From
Jupiter himſelfe; And from her ſtore
5 Doctor.
Of Spies, the Moon ſends
This to keepe the dore.
With Art of Action, now, make good the place,
In right of Love to give the Nuptialls Grace.
After they have Danc’d a while, Enter Projectors,
breakes ’em off.
Pro.Lay by your Jolity, forbeare your Sport,
And heare a ſtory ſhall inforce your pitty.
Fer.What black Tragedian’s this?
Ra.Some
Nuntius ſent from Hell.
Ga.One of my Maſters
Minions, a
Projector.
Pro.You had a Maſter: But to all I ſpeake.
Your practiſes have ſunk him from the Comforts
Of all his hopes in fortune, to the Gulfe
Of deepe deſpaire; from whence he roſe inflam’d
[S5v]With
The Court Begger.
With wild diſtraction and phantaſtick fury.
Pro.Mad, and has hang’d himſelfe–
Pro.All over ſir, with draughts of Projects, Suits,
Petitions, Grants, and Pattents, ſuch as were
The Studies and the Labours of his Life,
And ſo attir’d he thinks himſelfe well arm’d
T’incounter all your ſcornes.
Enter Mendicant attir’d all in Patents; A Wind-
mill on his head, and the other Projector.
Men.Roome here: a Hall for a Monopoliſt,
You, Common-wealths informers lead me on.
Bring me before the great Aſſembly. See,
Fathers Conſcript, I preſent all I have
Sw.Here’s a brave ſhew, and out-ſhines our de-
Men.This is a Patent for the taking of poor
John and
Barrell-cod alive, and ſo to preſerve ’em in ſalt-water for
the benefit of the Fiſhmongers.
Cou.There’s ſalt in this.
Sw.I this has ſome favour in’t.
Men.This is a freſh one ſir, For the catching, preſer-
vation, and tranſportation of Butter-flies: whereby they
may become a native commodity.
Men.This is for profits out of all the Common- Cryes
i’ th’ City, As of–Oyſters–Codlings– wood
to cleave, Kitching ſtuffe, and the thouſand more, even
to the Matches for your Tinder-box, and all Forrainers
to pay double; And a Fee out of the Link-boyes profits.
But no cries to eſcape. Tis for a peace.
[S6]Dai.
The Court Begger.
Dai.What if ſome ſhould cry Murder, murder?
Sw.Or women cry out five Loves a penny?
Men.All all ſhould pay. But I ſubmit
My ſelfe to your moſt honorable cenſures
Cit.What dos he take us for?
Sw.Powers, Powers; A lower houſe at leaſt.
Men.And all my patents to be conceal’d.
Sw.Our Projects would not take with you, wee’l take
Dai.He ſhall dance out of ’em: Muſick! Play out
our Dance, we will diſrobe you preſently.
Cit.Yes, and diſmantle his Projectors too.
They all Dance. In the Dance they pull off his Patents;
And the Projectors Clokes, who appeare all
ragged. At the end of the Dance the
Projectors thruſt forth.
Fer.An excellent Morrall! The Projects are all can-
cel’d, and the Projectors turnd out o’ dores.
Men.True Gallants, and now I am my ſelfe agen,
I ſaw th’event of all with good eſteeme.
And would as well as you a Madman ſeeme,
And now my bleſſings on your Son and Daughter.
Sw.This Bride, Dame
Venus here, cooles all this
Dai.By Mr. Bride-groomes leave, I’le ſtirre her blood
a little for the good meaning ſhee had towards me.
Cit.You may doe ſo. He dare’s not pick her pocket,
And for her Maidenhead I dare truſt him tho’ he ſhould
Dance quite out of ſight with her.
Dance.
While they Dance
Ra.’Tis well: And all are friends.
the reſt confer.
Fer.You have my poteſtation: and in that,
[S6v]Madam,
The Court Begger.
Madam, my faith before theſe noble friends.
Str.Upon thoſe honourable tearmes ſir
Ferdinando
Cit.Sheel’ have him, it ſeemes at laſt.
Sw.Shee’s a wiſe widdow by’t: for ſure enough, ſhe
ſaw ſomething in his mad naked fit, when hee put her
to’t, to chooſe a huſband by, wo’ not out of her thought
What is there more to ſay now Madam?
Sw.But to Supper and to bed?
Sw.We have had other paſtime enough.
tr.You reaſon well, Would all were pleas’d as well
T’ abſolve that doubt, to thoſe we muſt appeale.
F I N I S.
[S7]
EPILOGUE.
LAdyes, your ſuffrages I chiefly crave
For th’humble Poet. Tis in you to ſave
Him, from the rigorous cenſure of the reſt,
May you give grace as y’are with Beauty bleſt.
True: Hee’s no dandling on a Courtly lap,
Yet may obtaine a ſmile, if not a clap.
I’m at the Cavaliers. Heroick ſpirits,
That know both to reward, and atchieve merits,
Do, like the Sun-beames, vertuouſly diſpenſe
Upon the loweſt growths their influence,
As well as on the lofty: our Poet ſo
By your Phebean favours hopes to grow.
And now you generous ſpirits of the City
That are no leſſe in money then braine wity,
My ſelfe, my Bride, and pretty Bride-boy too,
Our Poet for a Boun preferres to you.
And though you taſt of no ſuch Bride-ale Cup,
He hopes y’ allow the Match to be clapt up.
And, if this Play be naught (yes ſo he ſaid)
That I ſhould gi’ yee my Mother for a Mayd.
Swa.
And why you now? or you? or you? I’le ſpeak
enough for you all, you now would tell the Audients they
ſhould not feare to throng hither the next day: for you
wil ſecure their Purſes cut-free, and their pockts pick-free.
Tis much for you to do tho’. And you would ſay that all
[S7v]your
E P I L O G U E.
your projects are put down, and you’l take up no new:
but what ſhall be (ſpectators) to pleaſe you. And you
Poetick part induces you, t’appologize now for the Poet
too, as they ha’ done already, you to the Ladies, you tothe
Cavaliers and Gentry; you to the City friend, and all
for the Poet, Poet, Poet, when alls but begging tho’. I’le
ſpeak to ’em all, and to my Countrey folkes too if here
be any o’em: and yet not beg for the Poet tho’, why
ſhould we? has not he money for his doings?and the beſt
price too?becauſe we would ha’ the beſt: And if it be not,
why ſo? The Poet has ſhewd his wit and we our man-
ners. But to ſtand beg, beg for reputation for one that has
no countenance to carry it, and muſt ha’ money is ſuch a
Paſtime!— If it were for one of the great and curious
Poets that give theſe Playes as the Prologue ſaid, and mo-
ney too, to have ’em acted; For them, indeed, we are
bound to ply for an applauſe. Becauſe they look for no-
thing elſe, and ſcorn to beg for themſelves. But then you’l
ſay thoſe Playes are not given to you; you pay as much
for your ſeats at them as at theſe, though you ſit nere the
merrier, nor riſe the wiſer, they are ſo above common
underſtanding; and tho’ you ſee for your love you will
judge for your money, why ſo for that too, you may.
But take heed you diſpleaſe not the Ladies tho’ who are
their partiall judges, being brib’d by flattering verſes to
commend their Playes; for whoſe faire cauſe, and by
their powerfull voyces to be cry’d up wits o’ Court, the
right worſhipfull Poets boaſt to have made thoſe enter-
ludes, when for ought you know they bought ’em of Uni-
verſitie Scholars tho’, and onely ſhew their own wits in
owning other mens; and that but as they are like neither.
As thus, do you like that Song? yes. I made it. Is that Scene
or that Jeſt good? Yes, Twas mine; and then if all be
good ’twas all mine. There’s wit in that now. But this
ſmall Poet vents none but his own, and his by whoſe care
[S8]and
E P I L O G U E.
and directions this Stage is govern’d, who has for many
yeares both in his fathers dayes, and ſince directed Poets
to write and Players to ſpeak till he traind up theſe youths
here to what they are now. I ſome of ’em from before
they were able to ſay a grace of two lines long to have
more parts in their pates then would fill ſo many Dry-
fats. And to be ſerious with you, if after all this, by
the venemous practiſe of ſome, who ſtudy nothing more
then his deſtruction, he ſhould faile us, both Poets and
Players would be at loſſe in Reputation. But this is from
our Poet agen, who tels you plainly all the helps he has
or deſires; And let me tell you he has made prety merry
Jigges that ha’ pleas’d a many. As (le’me ſee) th’
Anti-
podes, and (oh I ſhall never forget)
Tom Hoyden o’
Tanton Deane. Hee’l bring him hither very ſhortly in
a new Motion, and in a new paire o’ ſlops and new
nether ſtocks as briſke as a Body-lowſe in a new
Meane while, if you like this, or not, why ſo?
You may be pleas’ to clap at parting tho’.
F I N I S.
